I will begin compiling a list of things that I want. Some of these wants are devoid of .. timeliness or necessity. Some are imperative to my life. Some of them are just plain shallow. But I think it will help me orientate my priorities in life.
RIGHT NOW:
- I want sunshine.
- I want to listen to as much poetry as I can handle.
- I want sushi.
- I want to do yoga.
- I want gloves.
- I want something concrete.
- I want music, in my ears, when I walk.
- I want to go apply for jobs.
- I want to find that $25 I need for my vocal lessons on Wens.
- I want Insight to succeed. A lot. Progress.
- I want to write a chapter in a novel I won’t plan, but just open my mind and pour it all over the page.
- I want to be brave enough to do that.
IN THE FUTURE:
- I want to affect a large amount of people, creating a movement.
- I want to have money (that’s shallow, but I want it so that I can live, that’s not shallow)
- I want to wield a pen like a samurai wields a sword. Maybe get paid for that skill.
- I want to find a partner who is patient and completes me. But yet they also stimulate me mentally and spiritually.
- I want to be a vegetarian again.
- I want to live in Osaka or Tokyo.
- I want to be paid to study the relationship between information and how it affects society. I want to tamper with it, create new forms of it and use it to find new avenues for Journalism.
- I want to be fluent in Japanese and Chinese.
- I want to start a news network, adding to social progress and the free flow of ideas.
- I want children. I want to have children and I want to adopt.
- I want to be a published poet and spoken word artist.
- I want to marry a girl if I want and have my family attend proudly.
- I want to travel to Tibet.
- I want to work with social media.
- I want to devote one hour every morning to meditation and yoga.
- I want to make electric music and take my words and mix them.
- I want to perform.
- I want to perform with Saul Williams. I want to know him. One of my idols.
- I want to see Broadway plays. I want to perform in a Broadway play.
- I want to talk to Kyo, and really talk to him. I want to open a door and look inside.
- I want to live in a cute house where I can paint any wall any color I want and feel it’s my sanctuary.
- I really want to experience the mundane thought, “hm, what do I want to cook for dinner tonight?” Then turn on some NPR Jazz and cook it.
- I want a big dog. (that loves my baby cash)
- I want to have a clean, organized room.
- I want to have conversations with people; deep ones; crazy ones; shallow ones.
- I want to teach a class.
and because I think it is equally important..
NEVER:
- I do not want to work a job where I feel stagnate.
- I do not want to work retail.
- I do not want to marry a man and feel like a domestic possession.
- I do not want to continue procrastinating so much in life.
- I do not want to fear flying.
- I do not want to fear commitment because of my step-father’s cruelty in my childhood.
- I do not want my mom to live as frugally as she is, she deserves to feel secure.
- I do not want my mother to laugh off my sexuality when she is around certain people.
- I do not want to hide my sexuality around people who think it’s wrong.
- I do not want to hate.
- I do not want my grandpa to die. ever.
- I do not want to meet my father. ever.
- I do not want to loose faith in Obama.
- I do not want to conform to any gender or any idea. I want to be a random variable. Even if it’s chaotic I feel like I can control it. That’s true control.
- I do not to deal with passive aggressive people. Can’t handle.
- I do not want to live in a cold climate.
- I do not want to live my life vicariously through others.
- I do not want to raise my children in just one country.
- I do not want to accept the truths my parents swallowed.
- I do not want to walk in the cold to my car, which is several blocks away, because I can’t afford the overpriced parking that my University charges me.
This list will change and evolve with time, but for now, in this moment, it’s what I feel.
